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Anatomy Of A Backpacker

What is this place we’re living in? Society, I guess that’s what they’re calling it these days. I call it the social prison, man. We are, like, animals, caged within the concrete jungle, viciously tearing at each others’ throats for that next promotion.

It’s a conspiracy, man. They’re trying to turn us into robots. I know; I read something about it once. One of my friends knows a lot about it. The government, man. It’s time we pack our bags and hit the road. It’s time for us to shake these business suits and stubborn shells we call our “place in the world” and go back to the way things are supposed to be, man. Like, seriously, we were meant to live in the wilderness, and eat raw meat, and make fire from rocks, and fight larger animals. It’s the way of life, dude.

So first things first. Grab the hiking backpacks from the garage. We’ll need a tent, for sure a knife, insect repellent, a flash light, bear spray, uh, what else? I guess we might need some water. And, uh, oh yeah! Grab my sunglasses from the counter! I can’t leave without them. Do we still have that first aid kit in the bathroom? What’s the expiration date? Oh, ok, throw it away… Also, grab my hiking boots, please? I thought they were in your room… Shoot, I guess we’ll have to buy some then. How much money do we have? We only have $17? Man, what a drag. I wish the government didn’t take all my money…

Oh well, check out this infographic I found, dude. [via]

 

 

 

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